I MOUNTED FIRESCREW. Tim and I are lucky because we didn't have anything to do on a Wednesday. We drove to Alexandria, New Hampshire with the intention of backcountry snowboarding on the "Duke's Ski Trail". The picture in my head was challenging terrain and deep, soft snow. There was very little snow, so we donned our snowshoes (for the traction of the crampons) and decided to have a hike. Glare ice over rocks for much of the way. We followed the tracks of someone wearing actual crampons. Those things must be great! The tracks were like magic; they climbed up sheer faces of solid ice while Tim and I slid down on our posteriors. The picture in my head was a tall, thin, bearded guy wearing green clothes who works for the AMC on a morning hike to the summit and back before his daily duties at the Cardigan Lodge. We reached the summit and celebrated with a half of a powerbar before realizing that it was really cold up there standing around and eating. We were eating steak and cheese sandwiches in a pizza joint at 3:30pm under a big painting of a lake scene. Tim said the picture in his head of the guy wearing the crampons was the same as mine, except his guy was wearing red clothes.

Is FIRESCREW not the coolest name for a mountain ever? Tim is going to get a tattoo on his bosom that reads "I MOUNTED FIRESCREW". Should I? ...Really? What about the risk of Hepatitis infection?